Tuesday, 3 April 2012

Pleasing Others?

Hello dear friends.How are you all? Hope everything is good .
Well, today throughout the day ,I've noticed that , the majority of young girls, teenagers,young adults and seniors have a complex about theirselves.

It's uncontrollable ,I spoke with a couple of teenagers , and they were telling me that , they do everything to please others. For example , if someone tells them that they are ugly or they disliked their  jacket , instead of telling them a couple of facts, they prefer to exchange it the day after . In order to avoid any comments from others.This shows that  the individual is very insecure, and cares too much in what people are going to say or do . Being like that , you are destroying your self concept. your self image and self esteem , which is not good at all.

When you don't have confidence , you don't "stand out" ...Yes ! Imagine, if YOU don't love yourself first , and you are always ,depressed , complaining .Who is going to like to be around you ?? It's very hard being around someone who is negative . Someone that you always have to make a comment to make them happy .. Indeed , it's annoying ! YOU have to love yourself first , in order to love others after.

When you dislike your self image , you either tend to isolate yourself from others or do everything to please others. Trying to please men is when the media gets involved. You see the "pretty" , "sexy" celebrities (not that i have something agaisnt them ) on the TV , and automatically you want to be like them , because you see that the get attention from others . But that's not the right way of building a good self-esteem  because, what you see on TV and magazines  is not reality . They have been through thousands of transformations to look perfect.
Some have done surgeries all over their bodies, others have put a lot of make up to cover up their true beauty , others have been  edited through Photoshop. So, don't fool yourself, be who you are . Be unique . You don't need to follow others to feel good. Simply be YOU and you will begin to see that they will be the ones following you .

The statistics of low self-esteem are incredible ...

Take a look :

  • “Girls’ self-esteem peaks when they are 9 years old, then takes a nose dive,” clinical psychologist Robin F. Goodman writes on the New York University Child Study Center Web site.
  • Seventy-five percent of 8- and 9-year-olds who said they liked their looks. That figure dropped to 56 percent among girls ages 12 and 13.
  • Nine — Age at which at least half of all girls report having been on a diet. Eighty percent of eighth grade girls say they are on diets.
  • Seven million girls and women who have eating disorders, compared with 1 million boys and men. Ten percent report onset at 10 years or younger; 33 percent ages 11 to 15.
  • Twenty percent College-aged women in America are bulimic.
  • Girls who watch TV commercials featuring underweight models lose self-confidence and become more dissatisfied with their own bodies (SOURCE: Dove Campaign, “Dove Campaign for Real Beauty to Help Foster Self-Esteem in Girls”.
  • One-third of all girls in grades nine to 12 think they are overweight, and 60 percent are trying to lose weight. (Quoting the Girl Scout Research Institute, 2002-2004).
According to the National Association for Self Esteem, people who have high self esteem typically possess 7 desirable traits.

7 Desirable Traits of Healthy Self-Esteem

  1. Are friendly.
  2. Have lots of energy.
  3. Smile lots and lots and lots.
  4. Feel good most of the time.
  5. Talk positively to themselves.
  6. Draw positive people to them.
  7. Are independent and able to take risks.

Isolating yourself won't make any better ..

It's just going to lead into depression and suicidal thoughts !

If you try to follow the media you'll end up like this              

Change you mentality .. I don't think you would want to end up in neither of this situations.Would you? 
Look at the mirror , and love what you see, you still have eyes, nose,mouth etc. Even if you didn't, no one can tell you who you are.
 YOU know yourself more than anybody else!
Do something to build and strength  a self-esteem of a precious girl !

You will become like this!

Your self image, self concept and  self-esteem reflects who you are. It massively affects you, physically, intellectually,emotionally and socially .This applies in every area of your life, whether in your marriage, friendships, job and so forth.
I Hope you've enjoyed the topic, and  this message were helpful .

Love and Kisses,
Jessica Sebastiao


  1. Great post Jessica. Thanks for sharing.

  2. Thank you Sibon. Thanks for passing by and leaving your footprints ;)(Muahhh)

  3. This is one of the greatest post I've ever read since a long time now!! It's really amazing that you took your time to share this with us. You're absolutely right it's important to have confidence I think it's one of the key for happiness!!
    I really enjoyed reading this article and I wanted to say thank you for following my blog :)
    Have a nice weekend

  4. It's a pleasure Emmanuella , Thank you for passing by and leaving your footprints ;) muaww

    You too xo

  5. Great post, your blog's pretty awesome. I can't wait to read more :)


  6. Wow, love it! Thanks for sharing... Check out my page if you like let's follow each other!!!

  7. Thank you Iram , I will make sure that I am going to be updated ;) Thanks for passing by and leaving your footprints

    Love and Kisses,

    Jessica Sebastiao

  8. Hello Abby :) It's a pleasure , I am now following you darling !
    Thanks for leaving your footprints.

    Love and Kisses,

    Jessica Sebastiao

    1. Aww,Your soooo sweet, following u too!!
      Keep in touch;-)

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  11. likee your blog dear,
    keep posting and go for it!!


    1. Thanks for leaving your footprints sweetheart. I will make sure that I'll keep you updated .

      Love and Kisses,

  12. Olá Jéssica foi um grande prazer tê-la seguindo o meu blog, volte sempre, que Cristo te abençoe a cada dia!!!Um forte abraço
    Rosângela Oliveira

    1. Ola Dona Rosangela, o prazer e todo meu . Muito obrigada que Deus continue abencoa-la mais e mais. Outro abracao!
      Obrigada por deixar as suas "pegadas" no blog .
      Love and Kisses,

      Jessica Sebastiao

  13. I LOVE this and i'm definitely sharing it on my facebook page, people need to read this!

    1. Thank you Doreen , it's good to know that what I write touches people's minds and hearts :) Thank you for leaving your footprints on my blog, you are always welcome back (I'm following you now)

      Love and Kisses,

      Jessica Sebastiao


Thank you
Love and Kisses ,